I mean I’ll leave you alone if you prefer that
But don’t let me make home on my own
Then start to stir that
Pot like you always do,
When I’m strong and you prefer that
Girl who wobbles in the throttles of your paws as you claw that
Side out of me again and I’m poured flat
Scored fat on the scale of naivety
And kicked back into being your doormat
I can’t answer why I’m so soft here,
Why I lose all my swear words and spitting when you’re near
Why I go from steel toe to flip flop, from absinthe to blue beer
But I do, you know that too, and that’s why you don’t make it clear
Whether you need me or you don’t, whether I’m your front or your rear
So you keep me confused, spin me round until I’m dizzy,
Until I’m fizzy with frustration and busy
Trying to work out our situation
I’m still scared to text you after all these years
Nervous you won’t reply or will but it won’t be what I want to hear
I spose I’m looking for commitment,
For promise and devotion like King Lear
Wanting my Goneril and Regan
But you’ve only ever been my Cordelia
Loving me for all your duty allows
Never pushing those boundaries or feeling ta
And I’m feeling like a tragedy today
As I look out the car window and imagine you holding me
Picturing your arms laced round my back, your skin hot on mine
You folding me
Over and under, bending my extremities extremely
Then I snap back to the fast paced motion of the scenery
These hallucinations hit me randomly,
I could be eating dinner, in the bath, reading or needing sleep
And they’ll smash in, not carefully or elegantly
Just raw and messy and I love it
When I imagine you loving me
But when we meet up in our blue moons
There’s no spontaneous leg over or passionate pounce
Just twiddled split ends and past lives renounce
There’s no screaming or wailing or shouts
Just whispered catch ups and hidden doubts
I’ll treat you like a sibling, ask how your family is as if they’re my own
I’ll tell you all about my life, separate to yours, of course, and you’ll be told not shown
And most of all, I promise, afterwards
I’ll let you leave me alone
By Lyric Deep.
Lyric Deep™ 